This is my first post here; apologies if it's not appropriate as I'm not certain I'm pregnant yet.

I'm married, and we were planning TTC for sometime late next year. However, I recently explained to my husband that if I got pregnant before then, by accident, that I would probably keep the baby. He seemed OK with this.

Well, earlier this week we did have an accident, and I'm expecting my period on Friday. He's aware of this. If it doesn't arrive by Monday I'll be taking a pregnancy test.

Unfortunately, with this fairly real possibility of me being pregnant, my husband has said, "I'm here for you, whatever your decision." I replied that, "I think I may want to keep it." He didn't seem as happy about that this time around. He just said, "Whatever your decision... I mean you know I would come to the abortion clinic with you and everything."

So he was ever-so-subtly telling me he doesn't want a child right now. Which is fair enough. I know he wants children, but he admitted to me that he wants some more time of 'just us' before we think about babies. I somewhat agree, but the decision (if I turn out to be pregnant) is not as clear cut as that.

There are some there other factors. I suffer from vaginismus (undiagnosed because apparently my doctors don't believe in it) and as yet have not gone through a successful pelvic exam for this reason. I'm not sure how I would manage all the checkups with pregnancy.

As for our financial situation, it's not perfect but we could get by. I just get the feeling my husband wouldn't be really... into the pregnancy because he'd be worried about that kind of stuff.
I don't want to upset him. I already told him I am worried about him leaving me (my dad abandoned me and my mum when I was two), which I honestly don't think he would, but I want both of us to be happy.

Has anyone been in this situation? How did you know what the right decision was?

Well Im Kurt. Im 19. Im in the US Army. Im a firefighter in the US Army. Currently serving in Afghanistan which is why im posting this at like 3am your time. Its 130pm here =). Im pretty laid back and easy going. Pretty new to LJ which is why im in this community. Looking for a bunch of friends from anywhere and everywhere!. I enjoy talking. Im from a small town born and raised. I joined the local volunteer fire dept at the age of 17 and fell in love. I joined the Army to get away from the small town but will return when the Army is done with me which will be in 2013. I enjoy music. All kinds. Atreyu, August Burns Red, Something Corporate, Ace of Base, Mozart, Linkin Park, Limp Bizkit, Hollywood Undead, DMX, Eminem, HED PE, Slipknot, System of a Down, Serj Tankian, Blink 182, Sum 41, As I Lay Dying, Fear Factory, Static Lullaby, Plain White T's. But country is my favorite. Toby Keith, Trace Adkins, George Strait, Willi Nelson, Brad Paisley, Phil Vassar, Rascal Flatts, Lone Star, but my all time favorite is The Zac Brown Band. I also enjoy reading, I am currently reading Perks of Being a Wallflower. I enjoy reading a lot of John Grisham and Stephen King. Im pretty into movies and TV shows. The Saw series is one of my favorites but also Band Of Brothers or Generation Kill. Adam Sandler is one of my favorite actors. Well thats me!

A good compliment can last me for a year, but an insult can haunt me for a lifetime.- LaaVieBohemei

My little guy's really slowed down in the past few days, and it's beginning to worry me. I'm also not sure, but feel like I may be having contractions here and there. Nothing regular or painful, but I think I'm feeling my uterus tightening then releasing. It used to be that I couldn't sit down without him bouncing every which way and kicking and punching, but now I only feel him once in a while. Should I be worried about him? Is there something I can do to make sure he's alright, and how do I know if what I'm feeling really is contractions?

27w4d

"A great civilization is not conquered from without until it has destroyed itself from within."
- Will Durant

"The path of revenge is always lined with danger. By following the ways of those you hate, you risk turning into them."
- Darren Shan in Cirque Du Freak: Sons of Destiny

"When we fall in love we're just falling in love with ourselves."
- Spiralling by Keane

"Life is poison."
- Venus DeMars

"When they only know you by your car
It's who you come from
Not who you are."
- Lobo Town by James McMurtry

"If worms had daggers, birds wouldn't fuck with them."
- Todd Snider

"You gain a friend in a year, but lose a friend in a minute."

"Some friendships die because they aren't moving forward. They die from stagnation or plain neglect. You promised to call but didn't. You knew it was your friend's birthday, but were too busy to celebrate. When we're busy, we only do what comes easy, and even good friendships aren't always easy. Lack of attention and concern is sure to cause a rift. And when it does, it almost always catches us off guard, when we least expect it or can least handle it: when we're going through stressful times that make us less attentive and less able to respond—which is what caused the neglect to begin with. That's why it can seem that the best friendships break precisely when we need them the most. "

"And I wonder where the friendship went. What about the days and the memories we spent? Now it feels like I’m being replaced. Now it feels like I don’t know you."

"As we grow up we don’t lose friends. We just learn who our real ones are."

"It's sad when people you know became people you knew."

(I couldn't find who these quotes were by- sorry about that. If you happen to find out who they're by please comment! Thank you! :D )

I had my 39 week appointment today. I am still at 1cm and 70%-80% effaced. Im not too worried. she will come when she is ready. I had a pretty painful Braxton Hicks about an our ago. I havent had many my entire pregnancy. maybe is it a sign of something to come? haha or wishful thinking, either way. Hope everyone is doing well!

I'm Eileen. Some people call me Ellie. I live in Puerto Rico for now. I will be visiting Taiwan on December 26. My mom's side is hispanic and my dad's side is Irish. I'm passionate about Taiwanese culture, drawing abstract art, and traveling. I like to take pictures even though they're mediocre. My hearing is impaired; I went through many years of speech therapy. My journal consists of traveling destinations, events, art, random thoughts, and so on. I'm here for new friends!

Hello,

This is sort of an economics statistic oriented question. I hope that's okay.

I realize answers to this are going to vary by region, but I'm curious anyway. I'm currently shopping for a doula, and I live in southern California. That said, for those of you who have hired doulas, what is the going rate, and what region do you reside in?

For here, it looks like anywhere between $800 and $2000 can be charged by doulas in Los Angeles. Is that about average everywhere else?

On a somewhat related note, how would you react if a potential doula blanches when you mention the name of your doctor? Does it make a difference if you absolutely love your doctor? How about if you have reservations about that doc? This happened to me today, but I have reservations about my doctor, so I guess I shouldn't be surprised.

Thanks for your time.

This is kind of weird, but sometimes I worry about what it's going to be like not to be pregnant. This is my first so all of this is new to me. I just can't imagine not having this belly and something moving inside of me, and I'm due in 12ish weeks.
Sometimes I wonder if it will make me sad. It's just so surreal. I've had a great pregnancy so I don't have any complaints about being pregnant. I think I might miss it.

How did any of you feel after having your baby? Is it normal to feel sad or unusual after having the baby (concerning not having the belly anymore)?

Just wondering, heh. ;)

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Did any of you experience some light cramping during your first few weeks of pregnancy? I've been getting some cramping off and on that feel almost identical to the cramps I get just before and during the first day or two of my period. I have had no bleeding or any other abnormal discharge what so ever and it hasn't been awful cramping or anything, I was just curious if it was normal I guess. Sorry if this is standard information haha...I am going to be a first time mom so I am not familiar with how pregnancies go down at all.

Still not sure exactly how far along I am but my best guess at this point would be about 5-6 weeks.

The uterus tightening up is Braxton Hicks, right? How often is too often for this to be happening? I've been having them A LOT (painless). I'm getting kind of concerned about it but I don't know if it's necessary to be.

21w6d

I'm just curious regarding what kind of music you guys like to play for your belly worms, and what kind of reactions they have to certain kinds of music, if any.

I've been playing some Coldplay, Beatles, Lifehouse, some mellow-er stuff today, and he seemed to be going crazy and swirling around during Coldplay, so I thought that was entertaining.

How about you guys?

18w0d

In honor of all the good fathers-to-be/fathers out there, and inspired by all the recent rants against men, I'd just like to say that my husband is a great man and I can't wait to become a mommy and daddy together. Having said that, are there any other ladies out there who want to praise the men in their lives? If yes, what great thing(s) has your man done for you since the pregnancy?

This isn't any specific milestone but I had to post... Ari will be five months old in about a week and he has now tripled his birth weight! He was pre term and itty bitty and now he is somewhere in the 50-75th percentile for his actual age. :)

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Grrrr.

( Men... )

Life is not a spectator sport . . . If you're going to spend your whole life in the grandstand just watching what goes on, in my opinion you're just wasting your life.
- Jakie Robinson

When I finished my Nano-novel for this year I knew the story wasn't finished. It still isn't - but to be honest I don't really feel like writing much more on it either. I know I will sit down and finish it at one point, but not at this particular moment. I have spent a lot of time writing by hand these last few weeks (yeah, I know, great timing when you should write on the Nano, but I always write and I really can't change my habits just because I have to put a few of my words through a word-validator!), but I want to write something on my computer too.

And I think my brain has got an idea now! Some fantasy-twisted YA with hopefully a certain sense of humour. With three male leads and one female (as the main character), some swords because I like them, and the backdrop of a normal school (because I'm sick *grin*). Sounds swell, doesn't it? ;)

Life on a lifeboat isn’t much of a life... You get your happiness where you can. You reach a point where you’re at the bottom of hell, yet you have your arms crossed and a smile on your face, and you feel you’re the luckiest person on earth. Why? Because at your feet you have a tiny dead fish.

Life of Pi, Yann Martel